Last sunday was my sister’s wedding (3a 2beil l 3izzebeh ya rabb) so you know, the “happy family” was there, friends, min jami3o ( I made sure that the congratulations and celebrations song was not played). My little cousin was fooling around and did not want to finish his plate, so his mother waved her finger ka2ilatan: “khalles sa7nak wa2ella byotla3 7alib l nawar, HA…”
Wa2ella byotla3 7alib l nawar, HA…
What’s with this HA thing? Awwalan, what you are saying defies the Unicef children’s right, and adding to it this la2maneh thing at the end of sentence, this HA thing…Dude, stop wondering why there are serial killers and rapists in the society.
Back to our main subject, 7alib l nawar, eh w byotla3, ha!
You can’t imagine how many times I’ve heard this sentence when I was a kid, as well as the “byejeh 3laik abou kis”, or the “ba3ba3” whathaveyou. But Abou kis was very easy to visualize in a child’s mind. A huge freaking thing, hairy, with a never ending cigarette in his mouth, weird beard, old clothes and shoes, waiting for your mom’s green to pick you up and put you in this dark “kis zbeleh”. The ba3ba3 was even uglier, he was a creepy creature that doesn’t even speak our language. But 7alib l nawar, come to think of it, I was never being able to imagine something other than this stupid white liquid that I was never even able to drink because of my lactose intolerance thing.
The milk of the gypsy, what does it do when it rises, ha?! Someone please tell me. What, bifour w byejweh l gaz? That would be some extra work for you mom, not such a wise thing to do. Where does that milk come from? Do they milk an old fortune telling gypsy? Or do they buy this milk from the gypsies settlements? Ba3dein, who gave you the right to call these people “nawar”, ya nawar!?
I promise you, kein yotla3 daght my mom w ma kein yotla3 ma3a 7alib l nawar. Tol3o 3al amar, w ma tole3 7alib l nawar. Tayyeb w eza ma tole3 7alib l nawar, byotla3 khel2a…Khod ba2a, ta3a 2imneh, chou houwweh l khele2. Wleh kif badkon nkheif eza mouch 3erfin chou 7alib l nawar w chou l khele2.
Bass l 2adrab w l 2adrabein, wa2ta yotla3 3a lsena cha3er, houwweh w tale3 khel2a…EWWWW
To sum up, wa2ta y3azboukon wledkon, droubouwon, cause 7alib l nawar ma ra7 yenfa3. L 7alib ma bisir may, cause de22 l 7alib, 7alib!