How to survive a Blackberry Ban

Word on the street is that soon, we might not have the Blackberry service anymore. We are kinda used to these surprises, just like the kahraba, you wait a long time ta tejeh, 5 minutes later, BA7777.

But I don’t think that this will be a huge problem, cause we the Lebanese, “kif ma betkebbouna, mnejeh we2fin” ma mnerka3 and we always find a way out.

Let’s go back a couple of years ago, when the Blackberry service was not yet introduced, here’s how things used to happen:

Allo eh, laik, ba3mellak missed call awwal ma 2emeche, missed call teneh ya3neh ba3d baddeh chi 5 mins, telit missed call bkoun soret ta7t l bineyeh, bcharafak ma tot2akhar, natrina l jame3a!

Taraaaa! They can take away the BBM from us, but they will never, NEVER, be able to even lay a hand on the MC.

Yeah I know, we all are “MC” users, actually I’m a heavy MC user, la darajit anno 2ata3it fatra, 2ou3a billeil 2a3mol MCs la 2as7abeh! 7aram they would always call me back: *weird whispering voice* “Man beik chi?!!”… “Sorry man, kenit 2a2wa menneh, khalas rja3 neim, ba3mellak MC bokra wa2ta 2ou3a…!!!”

Anyway, MCing is not just a way to outsmart the big vampires of telecom, over the years, it has turned into an art, art 7akeh! Choufo la7adiyyet wein, I know a friend who proposed with a MC, she replied with a MC, he sent her a message: “dakhlik 7ayeteh, ne7na mittef2in one MC yes, tnein No, ma haik?”

That’s the main question, what does one MC mean, two MCs, three MCs, 2alakh?

Body Wotwat ladies and gentlemen will reinvent the MC and will set the ground rules, I will even contact the Minister of Education myself ( 2akhadet wijj ) w 2otlob menno ydakhel hayda l fikir l philozopheh b manhaj l te3lim…touras!

Let’s start with a couple, here’s what those MCs means:

1st MC: Miss you
2ndMC: La2 ana aktar
3rd MC: Bet7otteh Charet?
4th MC: Ana feyit 3al toilettes
5th MC: Daharet min l toilettes
6th MC: Eh man, sahra khweit, 7arim w tayab (oups, wrong MC)
6th MC: Miss you bcp bcp bcp
7th MC: ANMC*
8th MC: ANMC*

*Anti Nagging** Missed Call
**Nagging, i.e. 7ayeteh, wayn kenet bein l MC l tesi3 w l 3achir? Fi 10 mins bayneton, ma3 min kenet, bla bla bla…

1st MC: Je t’aime bcp “Biba”
2nd MC: 3an jadd?? Moi aussi!
3rd MC: Mnassa7neh l fostan?
4th MC: L 2a7mar walla l bleu?
5th MC: Chta2telleh?
6th MC: 7zar min 3emelleh invite 3a Facebook
7th MC: Machghoul?
269th MC: 7yt, nkasar dofreh dakhilak rawwej khedneh 3end l estheticienne!!!!!

Scene two: Between male friends:
1st MC: 7kineh wa2ta tofda
2nd MC: 7kineh 3al beit
3rd MC: Call me daroureh
4th MC: Wleh!!!
5th MC: Dude bcharafak wlo, 3eyzak b mawdou3 daroureh
6th MC: Tarakna
7th MC: Hiyyeh taraketneh
8th MC: Ma3ak chi khasmtaleif la 2ekhir l chaher?
9th MC: (Hon ballachet mar7alit l mich straight)

Scene three: Between female friends
1st MC: Waynik?
2nd MC: Betrou7eh na3mol shopping?
3rd MC: Bta3rfeh wein Rana?
4th MC: Ma ra7 tsad2eh!!
5th MC: OMG OMG OMG, crush crush crush
6th MC: Zara 3emil Sale!
7th MC: Blab bla bla

Before closing this chapter, let’s tackle the different wordings used to mention the MC.

3allemleh, b3allemlak (3asa t3allem…)
Mastikleh, bmasteklak
Tlobneh w sakkir, botolbak w bsakkir
Appel en absence (USJ)
De2elleh da2a w sakkir, bde2ellak da2a w bsakkir
Beep me (haydeh model l sineh)
Tojjneh missed call, btojjak missed call

Wizarat l2ettisalat tou7azzir:
2inna ltmistkol moudir bil khazina wa you2adi 2ila cha77 fi l souyoula

Body Wotwat:
L MC ma 3lai ghomrok, kill chi b baleich katter menno…3TIYA


About bodywotwat

I'm a Lebanese slang hunter, I hunt at night and I take no prisoners! Wotwat style!
This entry was posted in Mousalsal and tagged , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

7 Responses to How to survive a Blackberry Ban

  1. Patrik says:

    This article made my day 😛
    Funniest ever and probably so true!
    Cheers oh i mean MC!

  2. Pingback: W bekhsous l kahraba? | Body Wotwat

  3. Carla says:

    i love ur website! it makes me laugh!!

  4. Judy says:

    website rahib! ktir 7elo kif bit3abber bil lebnene! w a7la chi :different wordings used to mention the MC :p hehe l7elo kif el 2ajeneb byetfej2o min fekret el mc lamma byejo 3a lebnen :p el mc te3bir lebnene e777

  5. enno liom ktachafet this BODY WOTWAT thing !!!
    ( men wara a friend who ahred the taperware article on fb …. mesh 3atel fb eh !!! …. w 7echriyte mesh 3atle kamen 😛 )
    enno chou badde e7ke ta e7ke …. shou badde ellak ta ellak … chou badde 3abber ta 3abber …. enno ba3ed na2es tal3ak men l screen aw ana fout 3al screen , aw ba3tik ra2me w bta3melle mc w berja3 bde2ellak ta 3aberlak 3an mada e3jebe l chadid bel articles ….
    seret arye tleterbe3on …. enno eh lahaytne 3an fb chway …. mesh ghalat …. 7aseit 7ale 3am bo2ra shi moufid la marra …. mesh statuset 7alet nafsiyeh maradiyeh .
    bkiiiiiiiiiitttttttttt mnel de7ek …. i love ur black irony …. 3refta ayeha ? hay metl l de7ke l sefrawiyeh …. eh heik shi !!

    yalla courage man …. w let’s keep in contact !!

  6. Pingback: انطر يا كديش | Body Wotwat

  7. Pingback: بادي وطواط يطفئ بوجيته الأولى | Body Wotwat

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s